New Year’s Eve 2015 my husband and I went out to eat. Who would have thought that the conversation that we had that night would change the course of our life forever – that that conversation would result in us becoming parents in just 6 short months! We were reflecting on the previous year and talking about what was to come in the next year and chapter in our life. My incredible husband asked me what my biggest dream was and in the middle of that crowded restaurant I broke down in tears. I started to cry because I was overwhelmed with emotions thinking about my one heart’s desire.
It wasn’t a pretty cry either, it was a full on ugly sobbing kind of cry. Steve probably was wondering what he said wrong when I was finally able to blubber out: “I want to be a mother.” He replied reassuringly “I know, and it will happen!” I proceeded to pour out my heart, I did not care about having children of my own; I longed to be a mother to children who needed me now – I wanted to be a foster parent.
Before marriage Steve and I had talked about wanting to have children and the possibility of adopting in our future. Fostering is different though….with fostering their is no guarantee that the little ones you love will stay forever, in fact the goal is for them to be reunited with their family when it is safe to do so. Fostering is not for everyone, and I knew this was a lot to ask of my husband. It takes a very special man to love another person’s children. Steve is an extraordinary man!
January 2016 – the start of the new year we went to a foster parent orientation class, we kept going to the classes, we did a home study, and we were approved. In 6 months we went from talking about fostering to being foster parents to 7 and 9 year old sisters. Without getting into any detail about their background to respect their story and privacy, I will just say that through my husband’s love for these little girls came so much healing to their lives. No parent should ever have to have the heart wrenching conversations that Steve had with these girls and he did it with so much gentleness and strength. Steve is a father to the fatherless and he taught them how to trust again.
Even with Steve’s health struggles he continues to say “yes” to foster children and being a father to children whose father’s cannot or choose not to parent at this time. In fact, Steve was the one who said yes to our most recent placement. I was hesitant but he jumped in both feet first. We had two hours notice to go pick up a toddler from the DCS office, drop him off at another foster family’s home, and then go to the children’s hospital to room in with the toddler’s newborn baby sister. The very next day we took home a baby girl and her big brother. Instantaneously, we were parents again to two small children. To say our world changed would be an understatement.
I am continually amazed at my husband’s love for these children and the sacrifices he makes to continue to love and care for them even on his hardest days. In a world where so many dad’s choose to not be there for their children, you chose to be there for someone else’s children when you do not have to. Fostering is not easy and I cannot imagine how much harder it is while battling serious chronic illnesses. Steve, you are my hero and you are the hero to three precious children that call you “daddy” and a precious baby girl that cannot yet say “dada” (but I am sure “dada” will be her first word because of how much she adores you). The love I have for you Steve has grown so much seeing how wonderful a father you are. Happy Father’s Day to the love of my life and the daddy of the children who need you. Thank you for joining me on this crazy adventure that is our life and helping me love these beautiful children that we love as if they are our own. Happy Father’s Day!! I cannot wait to start this weekend of celebrating YOU!
The Two Shall Become One 